Forget Sugary Drinks, Pass These Laws To Make Parenting Easier

The other day, I saw yet another bill being proffered so that parents don't have to do their job.  The Healthy Kids' Meal Bill would require that restaurants offer water, juice or milk as the beverage with a kids' meal. Why? Yes, because it's healthier than, say lemonade or a soda. But, also, because parents don't want to be the bad guys on this.  Really? We're going to make a law, just so parents don't have to say "no, Bobby, you can't get a soda with your meal?" Really?

I get it - sugary drinks - bad for kids - bad for their teeth - blah blah blah.  I'm not debating whether lemonade or milk is more nutritious. But what I am saying is this: shouldn't it be my decision, as mom, whether my kid gets to have a lemonade or milk with their chicken nuggets and fries, as opposed to law?  Yes, there are kids who have fruit punch in their baby bottles (not good for their teeth, moms) but then there are those who only have the sugary stuff as their treat when they go out.  So... how about we let the parents figure out what their kids drink, when.

And as for the parents who need this kind of law to make parenting easier?  If you can't say "no" to this, what are you going to do about the really hard stuff? Like dying their hair purple or taking your car for a midnight trip to the beach? And how are you teaching them to say "no" to the offer of a cigarette or a beer or (sex)?  We're not regulating an illegal substance here, you know like marijuana (which by the way, folks are determined to make legal). And I might be more concerned about the legality of selling a 16oz of Starbucks to a teenager (talk about an addiction!)  We're talking about a mixture of sugar and water.  Don't want your kids to have it, say "no."

But if we are looking for some laws to pass to make parenting easier, here's a few options to consider.

• Cell phone companies must turn off signals to phones operated by those under 18 years of age at 9 p.m.
• Children's rooms must be cleaned, with clothes put away, each day, without being told.
• Voices shall not rise over a normally acceptable talking volume when a parent is on the phone; nor shall any child ask for cookies, a lost shoe, or permission to do anything during this time.
• No children's activity shall require more than 1 practice session per week.
• Any children-focused activity facility (gym, dance studio, karate center, music hall) shall have a fully-loaded and operational coffee machine and comfy chairs in the waiting area.

Any offense is punishable by the mother effected being sent to the nearest day spa for a pedicure, manicure, or if the infraction is bad enough, a massage.

Let's start with these.

In the meantime pass me a Pepsi & fries.

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