Summer Camp Should Be Running, Swimming & Crafts Not Movie Tickets

One of the fun things about summer - the $1 movie.  Granted, it's at 10 am, so there's no sleeping in and still a rush to get there on time, but to get me and my four into the movie for $5? It's a pretty good compromise.  So that's what we did today, went to go see Despicable Me 2.

The theatre was full of summer campers - rows and rows of little kids in matching tee-shirts.  And when I say "little" kids, I do mean little - they were like 2-3 years old.  Aside from the camp leaders who spent half the movie walking through the aisles distributing popcorn and juice and "whispering" loudly to the children, totally oblivious to the rest of us trying to get our $1 worth, as a parent, I was wondering if the kids' parents really approved of their kids spending their camp time sitting in a movie theatre.  Time when they could be getting some sun, playing with the other campers, or even learning their alphabet.

I know, I know - you're thinking "but you were there with your kids!" and it sounds a bit hypocritical to say that summer camps shouldn't take kids to the movies. But in my defense, here are my points:
1 - They are MY kids. If I want them to spend their summer morning at the movies, that's the choice I get to make.

2 - If/when I send my kids to camp, I pay for them to have a better, more active experience than I would give them at home. The camp checks are written so kids can run, jump, swim, hit balls, ride horses, build popsicle stick picture frames, and eat messy peanut butter and jelly sandwiches. We can plop them down in front of a screen for free at home - or for our own $1.

I've actually been pretty annoyed when one of my kids came home from camp and reported that their activities included taking a "field trip" to the nearby fast food establishment for lunch.  Really? If you're going to put my kid on a bus, then do something educational or at least entertainingly worthwhile. Take them to the park or to the zoo. Or even a field trip to the library for reading time or a puppet show.  Even when they've done after-school activities and come back to tell me that they played on the computer with their friends, I feel that's a waste. One thing my kids (and most kids) don't need is more time to goof off playing games on the computer.  When I send my kids to an activity, I expect them to get more out of it then that time spent with me at my direction.  Yes, when I pay for an activity, I expect the service providers to be, for those few hours, a better parent than I am. That's money well spent.

What do you think? Does it matter to you what your kids are doing in summer camp?

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Let Summer Be for Kid Stuff

Summer break, for us, is a little less than 3 weeks away. (There's some funky school days math with final exams, promotion ceremonies, class parties, etc. that confuse the count, especially for a mom with 4 kids in 3 different schools, but anyway...)  I know some of you lucky folks are already sleeping in and eating cereal in front the TV.  Or could be. But for many kids and families, summer will be just as hectic with summer activities - camp, tutoring, sports - as it is during the school year.

I'm truly the slacker mom when it comes to summer activity signup. I've filled out no registration forms yet. None. Zero. I did take my daughter to summer basketball tryouts last week.  And I'll get around to signing the kids up for summer swim team this week because practice starts, well, tomorrow.  And that's about all I have on the radar right now.

It's not that I don't think kids need stuff to do over the summer. I just don't want to have an active role in all that they do in the summer.  Yes, this is the season when I start to lament about how much time they spend in the house, on video games and texting their friends, rather than playing kickball in the street and building forts and hanging out with friends at the neighborhood pool.  I will complain a million times about having to take them somewhere rather than them hopping on their bikes and wandering off.  Selfishly, I admit, I'd like a break from chaffering and scheduling.

I also want to give them a break from the hard thinking.  No doubt, I will encourage, suggest, require that they keep up with some academics over these sunny months with math workbooks and a reading log and frequent library visits. But I will not require them to do the academic camps and the "what you want to be when you grow up" camps unless they really really want to. I have seen so many ads for camps for leadership, scientific research, writing a first novel, engineering, computer programming, career exploration, music production, math advancement - all to give your kid "an edge" or prepare them for their career. (And yes, my daughter did go to an engineering camp last summer, so I've fallen into the lure of making her a girl-genius, too.)  I'd love for them to spend part of their days drawing on the sidewalk with chalk or coloring a picture or building a cardboard go-cart.  We put so much emphasis on career planning for the 6-year old, we barely give the kids time to enjoy being a kid and all the fun stuff that goes along with that finite period of life.  I don't imagine it's documented anywhere, but I'm sure the lessons learned from negotiating who's "it," playing by the rules, and finding your way around the neighborhood will come in handy as an adult.

So here's to the other parents who haven't signed up for summer camp yet - academic, sports, or otherwise - and are feeling guilty. At least you're not alone. Maybe our kids can play together.

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Pack your Bags: for Sleepaway Camp

Are you one of those parents who booked your kids for a week or two or three at a sleep-away camp?  Horse-riding, canoeing, playing sports, dancing, pranks late into the night?  For many kids, overnight camp is a summer rights of passage.  Not for me.  Not for me as a kid and not for me as a parent.  (I don’t have the space here to go into all the psychological reasons why, just read Amy Chua’s Battle Hymn of the Tiger Mom.)

Not that my children don’t ask.  My oldest is going on her second year mentioning a college-stay sports camp and “because all of her friends are going” hasn’t swayed my thoughts.  The college is close enough that I’ve offered to register her for the day portion the same week her friends are there, but she’s pushing for all or nothing.  I like her gambling instinct, but she needs to learn to better understand the odds.

One of my kids’ friends gets a week or two every summer on his own, a flight or a long drive, but far away.  During that time, his parents cruise off into the sunset – literally, they go on vacation while he’s gone.  Admittedly, that’s tempting, but if I have to put 4 kids into sleep away camp, me & D won’t get much further than sharing a sweet tea & fries at the McDonald's across the street.

For all the kids who are going away, you know – all the kids in the world except my daughter – I turned to a friend, Tanya, for tips on making sure your child is well stocked and comfy in his summer home away from home.  One of the first things she said was to find others who have been to that camp before because they may have suggestions that are not listed on the camp provided list.  

The bags: a trunk, the kind you took to college, a duffle bag, and a small to medium-sized backpack for getting around during the day

In the duffle (to save space in the trunk): the sheets, pillows, sleeping bags, towels, etc. 

In the trunk: everything else -  clothes, pajamas, underwear, hiking boots, etc. Mom Tanya said, "the first year, I grabbed my camp packing list and started packing the trunk.  Quickly it became obvious to me that I couldn't fit everything in the trunk that was on the list.  Well, after several times of taking everything out of the trunk and putting things back in the trunk in a different order, my husband strolled by and offered another strategy to pack the trunk.  It worked!  However, in my excitement I didn't realize that I had taken out regular T-shirts and only put in white T-shirts, with 2 regular T-shirts.  So, in every camp photo, he has on the same two shirts."  

• Have your camper help with the packing, have them put in their favorite shorts, swimtrunks, books (most camps have time set aside for mandatory reading). 
• Pack some fun things for the whole cabin:  glow in the dark necklaces, yo yo's, whoopee cushions, etc.  Do not listen to people who used to go to camp back in the day and send horns, and other really loud noisy devices.  These will be confiscated from your camper, with a nice email sent back to you. 
• Don't send any electronics because most camps don't want kids bringing video games or other electronics.  (Although another mom's experience has allowed some e-games, or at least kids can bring DVDs to watch at camp, so check with your camp if your child will just wither away without his e-entertainment.)
• Don't send food.  If you want to send cookies baked by mom, send it in the care package, do not pack them in the trunk.  But go easy on sending care packages, if your camper is at camp three weeks or more, 1 package a week is enough.  Another friend, mom Denyse, says to also consider non-perishables such as granola bars or cereal bars for a picky eater.

While you’re waiting for your child to return to you:

• Don't expect to receive a lot of letters.  Most camps have postage cards and encourage campers to write down a few words and mail it home.  Some kids send lots of letters, Tanya's did not. 
• Try not to worry, let your camper have fun and take some time for yourself to have fun.  Your camper will be home before you know it!

Thanks to Tanya Landry and Denyse Hamilton, busy moms, for their packing tips.